Do you have a partner with ADHD? Maybe you just found out about it or you’ve known for a while. Either way, you may be wondering what this means for the two of you in the future. So let’s focus on that next.
What ADHD Actually Does to Communication?
ADHD is more than being forgetful or impulsive. People with ADHD struggle with staying focused, keeping thoughts organized, and regulating how they feel. This results in missed cues, conversations getting interrupted, and emotional outbursts that seem to appear out of nowhere and are overly intense.
Your partner may be dealing with ADHD if they regularly miss subtle hints, and/or non-verbal cues and appear to be distracted. They may seem to bounce around conversation topics and result in frustration. The ADHD is not being purposeful, however.
They are working with a brain that can process many different electronic pathways and is struggling to focus on one conversation string. Someone with ADHD may not understand that they didn’t just bump your frustration level when they seem to ignore what you’re struggling with mentally.
Emotional Bonds and ADHD
Volatility from ADHD is often emotional in nature, and can impact relationships significantly. Changes that may seem sudden to other people are a result of their nerve system working in a different way.
Emotionally volatile people suffer many mood swings, meaning it will likely be hard securing connection and relationship with the person and you will feel as if you are always walking on eggshells. The main thing to remember is that their intense emotions are probably faster and more extreme, so try to be conscious of the response before doing anything.
When there is stress due to hot topics, use of grounding techniques can help in actually calming the heated discussion. For example, pausing to name the emotion during discussion and to then sit in silence for a little to collect thoughts. These techniques will definitely help the connection between you and the person even when emotions are high.
Practical Tips for Stronger Communication
Be direct and specific
Being direct is also better than dropping hints or expecting your partner to “just know.” For example, “clean your room” could better be said, “put the dirty clothes in the hamper by 3 PM.” This takes guesses out and is less frustrating for both.
No Judgement
When your partner is explaining something to you, let them finish instead of interrupting. Their thoughts might be scattered, but if you let them speak, you’re most likely to find the true message under. Acknowledge what they’re saying and ask to clarify instead of jumping in with your own greed.
Use Tools That Help
Technology can be a real game-changer for managing ADHD in relationships. Apps like the Liven app can help track moods, set reminders, and build healthy habits that support emotional regulation. These tools aren’t about fixing your partner, they’re about creating systems that work with how their brain actually functions.
Schedule Regular Check-Ins
Each week, put aside some time for a mutual progress review that prioritizes both parties feeling secure in the space to voice their thoughts openly without fear of reaction. Such check-ins reduce the odds of seemingly insignificant problems blowing up, and foster a continued sense of connection for both people involved.
Constructing Emotional Resilience Having
Relationships where one partner has ADHD often require the emotional capacity to absorb some distress and remain composed. It involves recognizing the other person’s emotional state and reacting to it appropriately while also staying at each other’s support when interactions become overwhelming.
Validating the other’s experience, rather than dismissing it as an overreaction, is one of the most powerful strategies to build trust and collaborate effectively to manage one’s challenges.
It is also useful to establish a strategy when the tension level is about to rise. Having a coordinated “stop phrase” that communicates to both parties that it is time to pause the discussion is a useful tactic to avoid an escalation. Sometimes the most productive strategy is for one person to leave the discussion and re-join it a few minutes later to allow each person time to cool their respective minds.
Real-Life Strategies That Work
Small changes often make a significant impact for several couples. One couple, for instance, utilized a shared digital calendar to remotely track important dates and deadlines. This eliminates the stress associated with forgotten appointments and stress from last-minute bookings.
Missed appointments and last-minute bookings are a stress reliever. One family discovered that scheduled family meetings served as a vital access point for each family member to express their thoughts and feelings. They found that simply having a designated talking time to address issues prevented numerous misunderstandings and promoted far deeper relationships.
Functions of the Liven app enable users to track their habits to identify self-awareness and patterns to triggers. This self-awareness is extremely important to manage the symptoms of ADHD and facilitates better communication.
Conclusion
ADHD can hinder the ability to communicate and form emotional connections with others. But with the right tools and knowledge, it does not have to be an obstacle. It can be a valuable experience with quality emotional and communicative tools. You can use the Liven App to identify and communicate your emotional requirements. In knowing how ADHD manifests in your partner, and in using the Liven App, you can nurture a one-of-a-kind, strong emotional bond.
Instead of creating and maintaining a relationship with minimal to no conflict, the focus should shift to achieving a relationship that has an abundance of conflict and maintains the core value of the ability to compromise and work together. In the middle of the chaos, the ability to listen, accept, and work with your partner is what defines a strong relationship. It is what separates a strong relationship from an okay one. It is what defines a truly strong relationship.